Tuesday, November 11, 2008

I have failed a million and two times!!!

I feel as if I am constantly losing focus on the priorities in my life, and shifting them to accommodate my needs. I know what I really want is to focus on building relationships with people getting to know them and becoming invested in their lives. And yet, what I constantly focus my time and energies on is getting through my to do list.

And this is what I have learned: When I have my priorities in order, that is focusing on other people that is not just doing things for other people - but spending time with people and building relationships, I find so much peace and joy and happiness. Could this possibly be because this is what God wants for us as His creation. Fellowship and Love. This is one way we truly experience God in our lives.

But when my priorities are out of whack... I am focusing and stressing about getting through my ever so long to do list. I become very, very selfish, bitter and cranky. Perhaps this is because I have taken the focus off of others and placed it all on myself.

Others Focused = Happiness, Peace, Joy
To Do List Focused = Stress, Crankiness, Selfishness

I'm trying very hard to learn balance between the two and most importantly listen to that still small voice inside.. you know the one that is so easy to ignore because we are too busy.... yeah, that one.

And, I ignored it today... even though I heard it several times. Thankfully though, God was still able to get through to me and I am able to follow through and rebuild a friendship that has been waning. A friendship that has really meant a lot to me over the years.