Were they saying "Puppy cheeks" or "Puffy cheeks?"?

I have never been one for standing up for myself or for others and today I had a fight with one of my closest friends whom I will call *Anastasia (mostly because I think she'd like that name or perhaps she would prefer Annabelle). This is really the only second real fight that I've ever had when it comes to friendship.

I have always lived my life trying to please people. When I was in elementary school every day my friend would take my cupcake from the lunch my mom had packed me and every day I would fight back tears b/c I was so mad. I never said anything b/c I didn't want to lose my friend. Another story, I was always very chubby while I was growing up and everyone always thought it was cute to grab my cheeks and pinch them and say "PUPPY CHEEKS! PUPPY CHEEKS!" Although, now that I think about it maybe they were saying "PUFFY CHEEKS! PUFFY CHEEKS!" which would make more sense. At any rate I always fought back tears, not b/c the pinching hurt, but because I just wanted them to stop but I couldn't find the strength to fight back.

Any time conflict has arisen in my life I would always either given in and do what the other person thought was best or we would both go our separate ways never speaking to each other again. In the second scenario, I would put up a wall of defense and once again decide that I could never trust people and it wasn't worth the effort to let them into my life.

On those occasions when I gave in it was because I was afraid that they would hate me, never want to speak to me again and I would be disbanned from their lives forever. I placed my value as a person in their opinions.

Living a life to please other people has always caused a lot of stress and anxiety for me. In all actuality it has always been the number one cause of stress in my life, especially when I was growing up.

All that to say this. It is because of Anastasia that I am learning what true friendship is. A true friend will fight with you about something they are passionate about, not because they hate you but because they love you and want what is best for you. Both of you may be wrong, but in the end it is the growing and strengthening that matters.

*Anastasia has been used to protect the innocent