Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Winter

Ecclisiastes 3:1 There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven--


Winter by Tori Amos
Snow can wait I forgot my mittens
Wipe my nose Get my new boots on
I get a little warm in my heart
When I think of winterI put my hand in my father's glove

I run off where the DRIFTS GET DEEPER
Sleeping beauty trips me with a frown
I hear a voice "You must learn to stand up for yourself
Cause I can't always be around"

He says when you gonna make up your mind
When you gonna love you as much as I do
When you gonna make up your mind
Cause things are gonna CHANGE so fast
All the white horses are still in bed
I tell you that I'll always want you near
You say that things change my dear

Boys get discovered as winter MELTS
Flowers competing for the sun
Years go by and I'm here still waiting
Withering where some snowman was

Mirror mirror where's the crystal palace
But I only can see myself SKATING around the truth who I am
But I know dad the ice is getting thin

When you gonna make up your mind
When you gonna love you as much as I do
When you gonna make up your mind
Cause things are gonna CHANGE so fast
All the white horses are still in bed
I tell you that I'll always want you near
You say that things change my dear

Hair is grey and the fires are burning
So many dreams on the shelf
You say I wanted you to be PROUD of me
I always wanted that myself
When you gonna make up your mind
When you gonna love you as much as I do
When you gonna make up your mind
Cause things are gonna change so fast

All the WHITE HORSES have gone ahead
I tell you that I'll always want you near
You say that things change my dear Never change
All the white horses


I'm in the season of winter. I read a great devotional the other day about the changing of seasons and how the process of change was created by God and serves a specific purpose. I know winter is coming because I begin to withdraw from others and seek a lot more alone time journaling. I also begin to seek God more and question areas in my life that I'm not satisifed with.

I can't say that being in the season of winter is fun and it never comes at a good time. Often winter for me is a cold, lonely, dark place and I must travel it all on my own, this lesson I've learned well. Oh, I could bring others with me but they would not survive my journey, and in the end, we would be forced to part bitter ways.

I used to fear this season... and would dread it's coming in my life... however, I've begun to realize it's purpose and I've learned how to prepare. For me, my winter protection is the Bible and the loving arms of God for I know no matter how dark and cold it gets He is there the moment I need Him. It is a season of strengthening, just as the trees are strengthened so that they can bloom in the spring. My season always ends with me being happier, rejuvinated and most importantly stronger.

The most difficult and challenging part about this season for me is holding onto relationships that are important to me. Too often, I somehow end up destroying friendships without meaning to... however, I'm learning... and sometimes I have to take a break from my season of winter to build a nice cozy fire and invite people in.

I don't know how long this season will last. All I ask is for is patience, because soon I'll be in the season of spring - the season of joy and happiness and lots of laughter. I just hope I don't cause too much damage along the way. Someday you'll have your season of winter and although it will differ from mine - I will be there at the end of your journey with a nice big mug of hot cocoa and lots of hugs.

1 comment:

Jessica Stephens and Lisa Walker said...

jess says...

you know. i really appreciate the honesty here. and i bet there are those anti-christian nay-sayers out there that would totally think they were calling you b/c...*gasp* how can "winter" be a time when you grow closer to God? are you saying that God is depressing???? isn't He supposed to make you happy all the time? and that's just the thing. if you just want to be happy all the time, you will miss these introspective times where you can actually BECOME A BETTER PERSON!!! so...very wise to use the time instead of just feeling sorry for yourself for being "sad." you'll make it! :o)